IN THE SENATE OF THE STATE OF FIRESTONE
April 3, 2026
AN ACT
to Criminalize Cutting Our Bolts
Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the State of Firestone in Congress assembled,
§1. LONG TITLE
This Act may be also be known as the “Act to amend Grand Theft and Possesion of Thieves Tools Definitions”
§2. DEFINITIONS
(a) For the purposes of this Act, the “Criminal Code” (or simply referred to as “FCC”), as described by the Criminal Code Revision Act (R), shall be defined as: Firestone Criminal Code
§3. AMENDMENTS
(a) Chapter 3, §6, subsection (a1) of the Firestone Criminal Code currently states:
Grand Theft shall be the act of utilizing a USB device to facilitate the larceny of currency from commercial, industrial, or other private property.
(a) Chapter 3, §6, subsection (a1) of the Firestone Criminal Code shall be amended to state:
Grand Theft shall be the act of utilizing a USB device or bolt cutters to facilitate the larceny of currency from commercial, industrial, or other private property.
(a) Chapter 4, §16, subsection (b2) of the Firestone Criminal Code does not exist yet, but shall be created and state:
(b2) Possessing an item titled “bolt cutters” shall also constitute “Possession of Thieves Tools”.
§4. ENACTMENT
This Legislation shall go into effect upon the completion of the constitutionally required processes.
§5. SEVERABILITY
Should any part of this Legislation be struck down and/or declared unenforceable, then that part shall be severed with the rest remaining in full force and effect unless all is struck down and/or declared unenforceable.
Author
The Great and Honorable Senator TipsyKermit
Co-Sponsors:
The Great and Honorable Senator d3av2id1